Walking "Pigeon Toed" in order to keep my feet pointing straight...

Before I met my Defensive Line Coach at Sam Houston State University (SHSU), Tommy Adams, I used to walk and run with my feet pointing outward. Coach Adams observed how I was moving around during the football practices. And, he decided me to stop moving around with my feet pointing outward. Coach Adams instructed me to start moving around "Pigeon toed" from there on out. So, I began walking and running as if I was pigeon toed. Coach Adams explained to me that I was loosing speed while allowing my feet to point outward while running. If I was to start moving around while pigeoned toed, then eventually my feet will began to straighten out. According to Coach Adams, this simple exercise would eventually cause me to have better movement around on the football field.

Hours turned into days, days turned into months, and months turned into years while performing this daily exercise with my feet. Eventually, as Coach Adams predicted, I began walking and running around with my feet pointing straighter than I did before I began playing college football. Walking with straight feet was suddenly "second nature" to me. Coach Adams knew what he was talking about. Even after graduating from college, I find myself still practicing walking as if I was pigeon toed in order to ensure that my feet stay straight while I am walking. I even did throughout my workout in the gym today. And, the first person I thought about while doing it was my Coach Tommy Adams. Some may forget the life lessons that their high school and college coaches instilled onto them. But, I'm not embarrassed to tell anyone that my college defensive line coach had me walking "Pigeon Toed" in order to keep my feet pointing straight.

So on that note, I would like to say "thanks" Coach Adams for everything that you taught me about life "on and off the football field". I'll never forget the many of things that you taught me as a mentor and role model, sir. I miss our talks that we sued to have in college. And, may you always be resting in peace somewhere up there in Heaven...

Some people from my long past just need to stay themselves in my long past...

I got a call today from a person that I have not spoken to in years. We started out as Internet friends. And, I allowed my ole friend to stay the weekend at my place a couple of times because She seemed like a cool, hard working person to hang out with when she would visit from out of town. I even donated some money to one of their charity causes. Well, days turn into months, months turn into years, people in life eventually loose touch with each other. People eventually build new friendships with other people. And, during those years, we all attempt to gain some new insights and real world experiences with each passing moments. So, as I was saying earlier, I got a call from a person that I have not spoken to in years.

I was at work when I got this call. While she was sounding like she was happy to finally get in touch with me after all these years, all I could think about is why she is deciding to call me after all these years? Why now? When I'm at work, I'm at work. I usually do not like people to try to have a long conversation with me when I'm at work cause it is usually pretty hectic where I work at. And, one would think if someone has not spoken to them in years there is usually a good reason for that doing that to them.

So, while my ole friend is attempting to catch up with my life's story during that telephone call, all I am telling her that I'm working. Hint, hint. Meaning I can;t talk with her at that moment. But, my friend has not grasped the fact that I am a little busy doing some "work" and I am unable to stop and catch her up to speed with my life since we last talked. So, I finally tell my ole friend that I am a little busy to be talking with her right now. She asked for me to call her later in the evening about something important that she wanted to talk with me about. Oh, oh. I hate conversations from people in my past that want to talk about something important that they need to talk with me about.

Those kinds of conversations, from people from my long past experiences, means that they usually want to stay at my place for the weekend (in the near future) while they are visiting from out of town. Or, they want some type of financial endowment (loan, charity donation, etc.) from me for something. Either way, they want something for nothing from me with those types of "important" conversations. And, I am not really in the mood for those types of important conversations from people from my past.

But, what if a person really has something important to talk about? Then, my answer would be that person should have cut straight to the point while they had my temporary attention at that time instead of beating around the bush with whatever they have to tell me. In my sometimes fast pace life, "If you snooze with your words with me, then you will immediately loose my attention span during that telephone conversation." If a person from my long past is calling to just say hello, I'm cool with that call. If a person from my long past is calling to let me know that one of our mutual high school or college alumni has passed away, I'm cool with that call. Otherwise, some people from my long past just need to stay themselves in my long past...

I almost feel too embarrassed to even be blogging about it if I couldn't laugh about my own stupidity...

Where do I start with this blog. I was at work today. And, this morning, I had to go to the bathroom. As I was attempting to find the slot in my boxer briefs that allows me to urinate without taking off my pants, I could not find it. I thought maybe I could not find the slot in my boxer briefs cause I was just in a hurry to go to the bathroom. So, no big deal, I was able to still be able to urinate without any incident.

As the day went on, again, I had to go to the bathroom to urinate. I go to searching for the slot in my boxer briefs to allow myself to urinate. Again, I could not find that damn slot in my boxer briefs. But, I managed to urinate without any difficulties. I figured that I was just in a hurry to go to the bathroom again. So, no big deal.

I get home from returning from work. Once more, I had to go to the bathroom. This time, I did not feel like I was in a hurry to use the restroom. So, I took my time trying to find that slot that was so hard to find while I was at work. But, I was unable to find that ever elusive slot in my boxer briefs. That was the last straw, man!!! I thought it was time to find that dang slot in my boxer briefs.

As I search my the slot in my boxer briefs, I began to wonder if I was wearing a defective pair of boxer briefs. Or, maybe, I bought a pair of boxer briefs that just did not have a slot on it. Well, I finally got the answer to my question: There is a reason one should not put on their clothes in the dark. Cause you never know what you will put on "backwards". Today, I put on my pair of boxer briefs on backwards. And, I guess there is nothing a person can say about that hot mess. I almost feel too embarrassed to even be blogging about it if I couldn't laugh about my own stupidity...

A road trip without my satellite radio...

I have a road trip in the morning. I will being paying my respects at a funeral for one of my first cousin's mother. The funeral will be in the City of Jacksonville, Texas. I have not returned to that same city since the last funeral involving the death of one of my estranged father's brothers. If you have not guessed by now, I'm not into attending funerals. But, when it comes to the one you care about, you do the right thing. The right thing is to go to the out of town funeral to pay one's respects to your cousin and their recent loss of her mother at the funeral.

I would not be upset about taking this road trip, except for the fact that my satellite radio is malfunctioning. The part for the satellite radio has not arrived at the car dealership, yet. But, a road trip must I still do. Besides, I went ahead and bought some Cd's to play during the road trip. Only thing that will be missing will be the snacking during the trip. Got to cut back on those dang snacking habits of mine. I get to use my GPS device to get me to my destination. And, I love that GPS device because it has a blue tooth function that I have become accustomed to utilizing during my longer trips on the road. I love my blue tooth device!!! Too bad it does not have satellite radio on it. Just kidding. I can't help it that I am addicted to my satellite radio.

A road trip without my satellite radio is like me going to work without my personal cell phone: It's still doable, but it will be pretty dang difficult to go without it. I really shouldn't put much feelings into an intangible things like a satellite radio. Maybe this road trip is just what I need to see what it feels like to go without it. I've been going for about two weeks with the satellite radio in my SUV. I sorta got used to listening to radio stations with commercial. Sorta got used to the concept of life without my satellite radio at while driving around in my city. But, driving on the road is a whole other thing. Whenever I'm on a road trip, there are a lot of factors that one deals with during that drive. I hope that there are interesting things to look at during the road trip. One can get bored really fast if all you see are miles and miles of trees. If there are no good radio stations to listen to during the road trip, one can only hope that there are some interesting and funny people to talk with me during that road trip. If I'm taking the road trip alone, then forget the last two sentences.

Overall, I'll be okay with this road trip. It'll be good to see my cousin, her family, and my home girl that also live on that side of town. I used to do a lot of road trips back during my younger days. Somewhere between my career and personal life I lost my will to keep taking road trips. I especially miss the ones that I used to take to the Houston area. It was fun hanging out with my homeboy and family. We were a good tandem on the defensive line during our S.H.S.U. football days. Yep, those were some good road trip days. But, I digress.

I will be taking my longest road trip, so far, without my satellite radio. And, I will be okay...

I'm ready to get back to work...

It's time to return to work. I've been away from the job for much too long. And, oddly enough, I miss my workplace. Can't worry about the things that have occurred before I returned back to work. I can only attempt to catch up and move on with my daily work activities once I return. Still have to be more positive in action than negative. Still have to be more helpful at work than selfish. Still have to be more than I am at work than what others expect me to be. Still have to find the time to stop and help those that really need my help. And, on top of all of that, I still must love my career choice rather than just going through the motions at my job. Even though I have been away from work for an extended period of time, I believe that I am still the same person that had to leave work back in September 18, 2009. In order to talk the talk, one must be able to walk the walk. The best way to walk the walk is to lead by example. This is my mission once I return to work.

The time off has allowed me to look at my strengths and short comings. I managed to get my body to the shape it was before the June 2009 traffic accident at work. And, I now feel that the job can function without me. I am not the center of the world at work. I am apart of a much bigger thing. I work with a team of coworkers, investigators, and prosecutors that share a common goal while at work: To bring justice to our victims of family violence. And, to do that goal to the best of our abilities. To do anything short of that goal should not become a common thing for me to do. But, I should not be so hard on myself because I was not successful at all tasks or all things. Just need to keep at my craft at work cause my job is never ending and always evolving. This is the constant work atmosphere that I enjoy doing for a living.

And, this is why I'm ready to get back to work...

The "unknown" scares me sometimes...

There is only one truth in my life when it come to the successes and failures that I have experienced: "I am the master of my own destiny." When I am given a challenged, I attempt to face them head on, and attempt to complete each one within a reasonable amount of time or to my some one's satisfaction. Some days I am more successful than others. Yet, when it come to my own future, I never seem to get over that fact that the "unknown" scares me sometimes.

The only way I can describe how the unknown appears to me is a path through a dark forest with no known end in sight. I normally find some courage from somewhere and head into that dark forest to see where that path will lead me next. So far, I have been able to come out on the other side of that dark forest. Career wise, the path into that dark forest becomes more difficult and longer with each step. But, the rewards of wandering where fools dare to tread are usually worth the risks that come with the new job. Sometimes, I found myself having to take a little longer through the dark forest because my path becomes harder to walk at times. As I keep getting older, I still find myself making those journeys into one dark forest after another. I guess dealing with the unknown will always be apart of my career life, even if it scares me sometimes.

I think I am more scared of disappointing anyone that places their faith in me to complete a task: Be it an Employee of the Year Award, a Commendation, a transfer to another department or division, or a promotion to a new position or something. I work to justify other's faith in me. That is just who I am. So, when I say that the unknown scares me sometimes, what I am really saying is that, "The unknown scares me sometimes. But, I am okay with being scared of the unknown cause that is when I push myself to find a successful way to rise to the challenge of that unknown." Hence, the unknown can be used in a positive way in my career life when dealt with correctly.

Only time will determine if the choices that I made while walking the path of that dark forest were correct or not. And, only history will show that anything that I have done in life affected anyone in a positive way. Until then, I really can't allow the unknown to scare me into being afraid of making mistakes like my wise old mentor once told me. Worrying about making mistakes will only cause them to still make those same mistakes. Like I said before, the unknown scares me sometimes. But, the unknown is just what it is: The unknown. Nothing less, nothing more. Regardless, I am still master of my own destiny.

Those online dating sites: Can't get mad cause it's not working as you have hoped...

Ever since I first attempted to meet a woman that I envisioned to one day be my soulmate back in 1999, I still find myself single and still using the Internet to attempt to meet a woman that could one day be my potential soulmate. One can never be mad at those online dating sites for not being able to find their soulmates, yet. I laugh at myself for even being on such online dating sites, now. Somewhere along the way of my single life, I have lost the courage to attempt to find a potential soulmate through the old fashion way: Through the art of conversation. Sure that I have gained a lot of weight. My dating score may also be well below the national average in the State of Texas. And, I am not getting any younger with the passing years. But, I don't believe that I actually lost my ability to talk to a woman face to face in hopes of eventually scoring a future date with her. So why am I using those online dating sites? I really don't know why I am doing it. Maybe, just using those online dating sites to see if I am still being seen as an attractive guy to any woman for self-esteem reasons? Maybe, not sure, possible.

One thing for sure, I don't believe that I am destined to be one of those single old guys wearing a silk jump suit at a nite club while trying to pick up young woman to hook up with. LOL. I just can't believe that will be my dating future. I still believe I will see a marriage in my future. It's just a matter of time.I am a single 41 year old guy. I have a college degree. I am working in a career that I love. My positive attributes definitely outnumber any negative ones that I may possess. And, I have no children. My life is not anywhere from be over. So why I am using those online dating sites to attempt to meet women. Well, my dear friend, the answer is simple: Most men and women fear the possibility of being rejected by the opposite sex. And, I am of no exception. Hence, the reason while a lot of single people are utilizing those online dating sites. Those online dating sites probably act like a "buffer" between keeping your feelings from getting hurt after meeting someone that may not be attracted to you. Those online dating sites may also act as a "buffer" from anyone that may began to start sounding a little "psycho" during your conversations with them. Either case, one can't really be too safe about meeting anyone for any reason these days including on those online dating sites.

Those online dating sites do have at least one positive thing about them: An informal way of potentially meeting new friends of the opposite sex where they probably would not have met otherwise. I met many of new friends of the opposite sex from those online dating sites. And, I can't be mad cause I have not met my potential "soulmate" from those online dating sites. There is a time and place for everything. When it is time for a person to meet their special someone, it will happen with or without those online dating sites. And, I am cool and patient with that fact of life...